「I'm Having a Baby」So My Husband Told Me
Even Handsome Men Are a Pain
Translated by: S3
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*****
Black hair, black eyes, two horns growing from his head, and a long, slender tail with a pointed tip like an arrow. These features served as evidence that he was not human, yet they did nothing to diminish his beauty.
Or rather, I should say:
「Wow, what a beauty!」 The words slipped out involuntarily.
Lord Cloud is handsome, as are Lord Rauld and Arthur—my surroundings are filled with attractive people. Among women, Nonnalie possesses overwhelming beauty. Even to me, someone accustomed to good looks, the demon before me was undeniably a beauty.
Yes, a beauty. I suppose I could say handsome, but in the face of such dazzling beauty, I didn't want to use the word handsome; I deliberately wanted to say beauty.
It seems I have a magnet for handsome men... Should I be happy about this?
Just as I thought that, I recalled Lord Cloud's intensely displeased face, so I decided to forget about the magnet. I wouldn't cheat on him, even if he didn't plead with that tearful expression. Everyone enjoys looking at beautiful people, don't they? In my previous life, it would be like... what was it called again? Ah, idol. Like admiring a celebrity.
Wait, who am I justifying myself to when he's not even here?
For now, I'll forget the strange-faced Lord Cloud in my mind.
The beauty in front of me was looking at me with a puzzled expression for babbling nonsense instead of answering his question.
「Ah, well, um, regarding what I came here for...」
As I started to answer, I paused to consider. Should I tell the truth?
The reason I came to this forest was the meat being sold in the human market, which was likely monster meat. It could probably be eaten since it looked similar to beast meat, but the bigger problem was the defilement.
Why did the monster meat carry such strong defilement?
My theory was that the monsters were subjected to cruel treatment by the hunters—the humans—when they were being hunted.
If that were the case, wouldn't the demon in front of me become enraged?
At worst, might he start shouting, "I'll kill all humans!"? That would be extremely bad.
The relationship between humans and demons is built upon a very delicate and precarious balance. It could collapse in an instant with just a little added weight. This, in turn, leads to the path of all-out war between humans and demons.
Both humans and demons want to avoid that, yet they also understand that war is inevitable if a strong catalyst occurs. As a peace-loving pacifist, I desperately want to avoid conflict.
Therefore, the correct option here might be to:
▶▶▶ Remain silent
So, my reply was: 「I came to look for some rare medicinal herbs!」
「Medicinal herbs?」
「Yes. There are many herbs around the forest entrance.」
「That is true. I know they are effective for human bodies, and I know that you gather them. To us, they are merely weeds, so we tacitly allow it as a form of forest cleaning.」
「Forest cleaning!」
So that's what we're called without realizing it. Wait, the demons knew that humans were gathering herbs? That's terrifying.
「If it is medicinal herbs, wouldn't the vicinity of the entrance suffice? Why go to such dangerous depths?」
「Well, um... because I was looking for rare herbs...」
「What is the purpose of those rare herbs?」
「...Actually, someone I know has contracted an incurable disease.」
「Is it a disease in your head?」
「Why would you think the disease is in my head?」
Don't answer that, even though I asked. If I hear the reason, I'm sure I'll get angry.
I cleared my throat with a little ahem.
「Well, um... an acquaintance of mine has contracted an illness that cannot be cured by human power.」
「Is it your face?」
「It is my! ACQUAINTANCE!」
What's this about a disease on my face! Are you trying to call me ugly! Compared to a beauty like you, I'm certainly homely, but leave me alone!
「...Can being homely be cured by medicinal herbs?」 I asked out of curiosity. He replied, 「Do you think it can be cured?」 What is this? Is he messing with me?
「I’m tired. May I go home?」
「Wait. It seems you helped my son. I wish to thank you, so follow me.」
「No, thank you.」
「Why?」
「I've been strictly warned not to follow strangers.」
「...You don't look like it, but are you perhaps under 10 years old?」
「If I look like that, you should probably go to an ophthalmologist.」
「Ganka?」
「A doctor.」
Argh! What is this conversation! It's so tedious! I want to go home quickly!
Also, I'm worried about Nonnalie and Zen. I think they'll be fine because Nonnalie is there, but what if they are attacked by those defiled monsters? And multiple ones at that. In that case, both of them would be in danger. I need to leave this place quickly.
「Since there don't seem to be any herbs, I'll be going now.」
「Don't be in such a hurry.」
Enough! He's annoying! What is with this demon! Just as I thought, demons are self-centered and push their own convenience on others!
Suddenly, my hem was tugged, and I looked down to see the demon child from earlier looking up at me.
「Are you leaving?」
Don't look at me with those puppy dog eyes!
In the midst of my panic, it happened immediately after: a piercing sound reached my ears.
A scream echoed through the forest.
*****
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