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EVERYONE IS GUILTY

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*****

「――That is absolutely not true!」

Having overheard the entire exchange via Berta’s spiteful voice transmission magic, Arcelia stared straight into Rob's eyes with her wide gaze, as if desperate to prove there wasn't a single lie in her words.

「But~」

「Yes, it's all completely true. But there is absolutely no way the Alliance would ever look down on a Hero! I became an investigator precisely because I admired Heroes so much. How could someone like that ever treat a Hero with disrespect?!」

Arcelia cut Berta off, stating her case with total conviction.

According to the Alliance's records alone, two or three Demon Kings were confirmed every year, resulting in the complete destruction of numerous unmonitored worlds. Heck, once every decade or so, even an official member world of the Alliance would get wiped off the map. That was why absolutely everyone looked up to a true "Demon King Slayer" who managed to take down one of those monsters.

Pivoting back to Berta, Arcelia didn't give her a single second to respond before pressing further.

「――You're just taking plain facts and twisting them maliciously! What exactly are you trying to accomplish here?!」

「I'm not twisting anything~ How he takes it is entirely up to Rob, wouldn't you say?」

Berta gave Rob a seductive look, while Arcelia kept her eyes locked squarely on him.

「Like I'm supposed to know who's right here,」 Rob grumbled, giving a noncommittal shrug.

Berta pouted at Rob's wishy-washy response, while Arcelia bit her lip in sheer frustration.

「Well, for an ordinary guy like me, stability is everything. If it means being wrapped up in something this soft and fluffy, I wouldn't even mind... wait, huh?」

Before he knew it, the giant fluffy serpent had slipped away. The Drachenos, the ten-legged dog—every single one of the Beasts of the World Tree had vanished back into the tall grass. Even Berta's left-behind dog familiars were looking uncharacteristically downcast.

「Did I say something wrong?」

Just then, Rob felt the presence he had been tracking ever since they left the log cabin closing in. Berta must have noticed it too, because she casually floated a few paces backward.

「I swear I didn't do anything here~」

「It's the patrol squad. The fact that they've come this close means... well, you know.」

The presence completely surrounded Rob's group while maintaining a respectful distance.

(Greedy mortals, you are a blight upon our eyes. Begone.)

The invisible Alfar patrol squad unleashed a wave of raw intimidation, delivering their final warning directly via telepathy through Mind Opening.

Berta's provocative seduction. Rob's arrogance and general lack of care. Arcelia's stubborn hostility directed at Berta.

Even with Mind Reading, they couldn't see every little thought. However, if a heart radiated enough malice and animosity to register on their radar, it automatically made them a target for a warning.

「This is exactly why I hate this world,」 Berta muttered. With that parting shot, she vanished into thin air without a trace.

「...So that's why she was so grumpy. Well, time for us to make tracks too,」 Rob said.

Suddenly feeling a strangely familiar gaze, he turned around to find Berta's dog familiars left entirely behind, just like before. The dogs stared back at Rob with expressions that practically screamed, *Wait, seriously?*

「「「「「...」」」」」

「...You guys might want to look into a career change, just saying,」 Rob remarked with a sigh.

The dog familiars vigorously shook their heads from side to side.

Just as Rob opened his mouth to tease them a bit more, a magic circle rippled across the grass. Looking immensely relieved, the dog familiars scrambled into the portal.

After that, Rob and Arcelia practically sprinted through the checkpoint.

With a farewell from the Alfar that perfectly matched in both spoken word and internal thought—「Don't ever come back. (Don't ever come back.)」—ringing in their ears, they hauled tail and scrambled back onto the Interworld Train.

***

Walking down the train's deck, Rob couldn't help but chuckle to himself. He'd always figured he lived a relatively upstanding life, yet in this world, he was treated like a straight-up criminal. You really couldn't make this stuff up.

「The multiverse is a wild place.」

Still, he could totally get why Berta said she hated this place. Honestly, he wouldn't want to live in a world like this either, and he knew for a fact that someone as riddled with worldly desires as himself wouldn't last a day anyway.

Back in their cabin, Rob and Arcelia sat facing each other on the sofas just like always.

「...Please let me explain,」 Arcelia began, a heavy, conflicted look on her face.

「Hey, it's not like it's your fault. Don't sweat it. It's not like you can just go defying your bosses on a whim, anyway.」

「No, I need to explain everything properly from the very beginning.」

Arcelia laid out her background and the exact circumstances behind how she got assigned to this mission. Her career path was pretty much identical to what Berta had leaked: she flunked the investigator exam, took a desk job in the administration section, kept failing the annual test year after year, and finally made the cut in her eleventh year.

「It is true, as Berta Andele pointed out, that assigning a high-profile case like this to someone on their very first field mission is practically unheard of. But that is solely because the situation was incredibly dire.」

The world Rob had been reincarnated into was located incredibly far away from Alliance Headquarters. While that was the reason Rob was currently getting a grand tour of various alternate realities on the Interworld Train, that sheer distance also meant the Alliance couldn't deploy a rapid-response team. That was exactly when the intel dropped that a Hero from the literal boondocks of the multiverse was wanted by the law.

The undercover agents stationed inside that world were the Alliance's absolute last line of defense, so they couldn't just blow their cover over this. With every other senior investigator completely booked up, a rookie was the only option left. And out of all the rookies, Arcelia—who at least had a solid decade of administrative experience under her belt—got tapped for the job.

「So please understand, we are absolutely not taking you lightly!」

Arcelia pleaded with every fiber of her being, desperately hoping to clear up the misunderstanding.

「Ah, gotcha. No wonder you don't really give off those typical elegant elf or fairy vibes.」

Rob's response came from such a bizarre left-field angle that Arcelia was completely left speechless.

Even as she sat frozen, Rob openly scanned Arcelia as she sat curled up on the opposite sofa. Her petite, delicate frame certainly matched up with what he knew about elves, fairies, and their close relatives. But the lean, whipcord muscles packing that slight frame didn't have a single drop of effortless elven grace to them—they were the result of a brutal, absolute hell-regimen of self-discipline.

「Well, I've gotta say, I'm a big fan of how toned you are.」

If it was meant as a lighthearted joke to clear the air, the totally shameless smirk plastered across Rob's face completely derailed it. Here she was pouring her heart out in a life-or-death serious conversation, so why did this Hero always have to be such a total creep? Honestly, who could blame Arcelia for having that exact thought cross her mind?

「...I let it slide before because we were in the middle of a mission, but I am putting my foot down right now for future reference. That is literal sexual harassment. The Alliance has a zero-tolerance policy for that, you know.」

Arcelia shot him a completely deadpan glare.

「Come on, labeling every little thing as harassment is a bit much, don't you think? Smooth communication practically requires a little bit of locker-room humor to break the ice.」

Rob was still treating it like a joke. After all, he had never landed a real job or properly entered corporate society back in Japan before getting pulled away, and his fifteen long years as a Hero in the Kingdom of Hanover—a place where modern ethics were basically non-existent—meant his concept of harassment was practically subterranean.

「Understood. Once we arrive at Headquarters, I will personally ensure you receive all the cooperation necessary to prevent you from embarrassing your title as a Hero.」

Announcing her new mission with an absolute aura of burning determination, Arcelia whipped out her book-shaped terminal and began frantically typing away.

「Yeah, thanks but no thanks, I'll pass... and she's completely tuning me out.」

Rob groaned, but the damage was already done. Once Arcelia locked onto a target, there was no stopping her.

「With that in mind, I need to know your long-term goals and career preferences. For a legendary Demon King Slayer, securing a position as a field investigator shouldn't be much of a hurdle at all.」

Rob almost snapped back with a sarcastic *What are you, my high school guidance counselor?*, but looking at her, he realized that—aside from her pint-sized height—she radiated the exact energy of a straight-laced schoolteacher. All he could do was let out a wry laugh.

「My career path, huh...」

(Truth be told, he hadn't given it a single thought. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew he couldn't just coast along forever like this, but he hadn't planned out any concrete next steps. No, it was more accurate to say he was actively dodging the issue. He had optimized his entire existence to survive as a living weapon called a Hero, but his current power level was less than half of what it used to be. On top of that, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that every single bullet he fired shaved off another piece of his fading strength. He didn't love fighting enough to charge back onto a battlefield with a heavily nerfed kit. But at the same time, trying to find a normal civilian career path when your only transferable skill was tactical warfare was a total dead end.)

「...Well, I'm sure I'll figure something out by the time we hit Headquarters.」

Faced with such a completely laid-back answer, Arcelia didn't press him. Instead, she just nodded along smoothly.

「Fair enough. In that case, let us begin with the basics of Alliance ethics, common sense, and legal awareness.」

It felt exactly like a classroom lecture was about to kick off, and Rob's soul practically left his body as awful flashbacks of his high school days washed over him.

「Uh, actually, I have plans to meet up with someone in the lounge today?」

「Oh, I already messaged them through my terminal a moment ago. They were incredibly impressed by how diligent a legendary hero is and happily gave us their blessings to reschedule.」

As Rob sat there like a fish out of water, his mouth flapping open and closed in utter disbelief, Arcelia didn't even crack a smile as she ruthlessly opened her lecture.

*****

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