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Thus Spoke the Heroine

Translated by: ME

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*****

「So, Hana-san... you were definitely Japanese in your past life, correct?」

I decided to start there.

「Yes, that is correct. And you, Ann-san...」

「I'm Japanese as well. I'm from a region where we call these sweets 'Oban-yaki.'」

「So, from the Kaiten-yaki...」

Listen, they aren't 'Kaiten-yaki'! They're Oban-yaki!

No, I should drop this subject...

「You were so into the game that you unlocked every single achievement, right?」

「I used a cheat for the Freshness Prince’s ending, but... yes,」 Hana-chan nodded. 「What about you, Ann-san?」

「I’ve cleared everything except the Freshness Prince.」

「Ah! Oh man, I really wish I could give you my MOD!」

「I want it so bad, seriously!」

According to Hana-chan, the cheat MOD she created was a simple plugin. Apparently, you just toss the downloaded plugin into the data folder and launch the game, and all the achievements unlock instantly upon startup. Once that’s done, you can just chuck the used plugin into the recycle bin. It was a performance-friendly design that left nothing behind in the registry.

(What the—that is way too convenient...)

「So, um, there are several things I’d like to ask you...」

Hana-chan smiled. 「What is it?」

She really is the heroine of a genre-less game. Even if the genre is missing in action, a heroine is still a heroine. She’s incredibly cute.

「The knight you were with in front of the shop the other day—that was definitely 'Taurus-kun,' wasn't it?」

「It was.」

Hana-chan gave a firm nod.

So that really was Taurus-kun... He looked considerably different from the game, though.

「Does that mean you did that classic 'Otome Game Reincarnation' thing—breaking flags by relying on your memories?」

「I did. ...Ann-san.」

Hana-chan stared at me with serious eyes.

(W-what is it...? Ba-dump)

「Would you be willing to listen to the story of my life 'until now'...?」

***

I realized I had 'reincarnated into a game world' when I was six years old.

It might be an 'Otome Game Reincarnation.' ...Though it's the kind of game where the question 「What even is an otome game?」 is the first thing that comes to mind.

When I was six, there was a renovation of the butcher shop my parents ran. Since it was a business passed down from my grandparents' generation, the facilities had become quite dilapidated. My parents were fired up, having meetings with the contractor to overhaul both the interior and exterior—making the shop wider, brighter, and more inviting.

Since the construction site was dangerous, I was sent to stay with my grandparents in the countryside. Eventually, the work was finished, and my parents happily told me, 「It’s become so beautiful!」

I went to our shop-cum-home in the royal capital full of excitement. But when I looked at the storefront my father was proudly showing off, I was struck by a strange sensation of 「Huh?」

A bright red arcade-style sign. On it were the characters for our shop name, 『Fahrenheit Butcher Shop.』 To the left and right of the name were the words 『Delicious』 and 『Delicious』 in yellow, vertical text.

The moment I saw it, the phrases 「Along Route 〇」 and 「Green Onion Ramen」 flashed through my mind.

Route... Green onion ramen... Ugh, my head...!!

It was no joke; I developed a splitting headache and collapsed, staying bedridden for two days. While I was down, I was eating green onion ramen in my dreams. To make matters worse, I even had specific thoughts like, 「The Ra-Sho along the bypass in 〇〇 Town is better than this Ra-Sho...」

Then, when I woke up, I had remembered the memories of my past life.

...I can't believe the trigger for remembering my past life was Ra-Sho...

Surely there should be more to it!? Like meeting your (future) fiancé love interest, or hitting your head!

But Ra-Sho!? Remembering a past life because of green onion ramen!?

I have my complaints about how I remembered, but there's no use complaining now. Regardless, I had remembered my past life. And I understood that the world I lived in was the world of a very ridiculous game. Furthermore, I understood that I was the heroine of that game.

Reincarnated as the heroine!?

What the—!? Did I do something that bad in my past life!?

In 'Game Reincarnation' stories, isn't being the heroine a straight shot toward being the target of a 'serves-you-right' social ruin!?

I nearly fell into despair at the thought, but I quickly snapped out of it.

This heroine has no reason to be ruined.

The creator may have insisted it was an 「Otome Game,」 but the game I was reincarnated into was one where people said the 「romance elements got in the way.」 As a heroine running a shop, I have business rivals, but no rivals in love. Even the rivals don't use underhanded tactics; it’s simply a contest of who can attract more customers.

If anything, as someone who played the game and knows the 「management part strategies,」 don't I basically have cheat-level knowledge to get the business on track?

I can do this...!

I can make it in this world...!

Our butcher shop can take over the world...!

Thinking that, I first bought a notebook at a nearby stationery store and wrote down every bit of walkthrough info I could remember.

In many 'Game Reincarnation' stories, the protagonist uses Japanese here so that 'it's okay if people around them see it.'

However, in the Sei-Sene Kingdom where I was reincarnated, the mother tongue was 100% Japanese. Mono no aware, ito okashi...

Write it in English!? No, that’s impossible... I only have a Grade 4 Eiken certification...

By the way, English is the language of the 'Rice Empire' across the sea. The 'Rice Empire'—in other words, the 'Empire of Rice' (Bei-koku) → America (Bei-koku). So it isn't actually 'English,' but 'American.' Though if you translate it back into American, it’s 'English.' Nitpicking the details in this world is just bad manners.

After worrying for a bit, I decided to record the walkthrough info in the only mother tongue I could handle freely. I did, however, make sure to hide the notebook in a locked drawer. If anyone saw that, my parents would start worrying about (the state of) my head...

It was an unforeseen circumstance to be reincarnated into a game world, but I loved my parents and grandparents, and I loved everyone in the neighborhood. There is no danger to the heroine’s life during the game.

It’s not like I’m in a medieval European-style world struggling to adjust to the common sense of that era... well, sort of. It’s a comedy space-time game with a hybrid world-view of '20% Medieval Europe + 80% Modern Japan,' so you have carriages racing down roads that clearly look like Japanese shopping districts, while noble ladies in dresses and gentlemen in tailcoats stroll about.

The basic cultural style is almost entirely modern Japan. There are more familiar elements than unfamiliar ones.

The pressing concerns for me after regaining my memories were: 「Do the other heroines exist?」, 「Do the business-interfering nuisances (love interests) exist?」, and 「Are the heroine's parents really going to die?」

I was able to confirm the existence of one love interest, the Crown Prince, immediately. On the Prince’s birthday, it’s reported all at once in the newspapers. Based on his name and the vibe of his face, it’s certain he’s a love interest.

However, he is the love interest if you choose to be the fishmonger. Not for me, the butcher heroine.

If the Crown Prince exists, then there is a high probability that the other three exist as well. And if the Crown Prince exists—who appears when the heroine chooses the fishmonger—then the fishmonger shop must also exist.

I have to go check...!

By remembering my past life, my bicycle training wheels came off. The memories of how to ride helped me. Up until then, I had been too scared, riding around on a bike with training wheels that went clatter-clatter. Now that the training wheels were off, I felt a bit like a big girl.

I pedaled smoothly through the streets of the capital on my prized yellow child's bicycle. The road wasn't asphalt but slightly bumpy cobblestones, so I felt like I’d fall if I wasn't careful.

I first headed to District 2 of the Capital Shopping District.

The scenery of the shopping district was exactly the same as District 1 where I lived...

In the game, the backgrounds were indeed 'compatible' single images where only the shops were swapped out...

Wait, if there are three heroines, there’s a possibility they all have the exact same character design... And by extension, all three might have the same name and the same profile...

No, surely not. Even if it is a joke of a game world, it couldn't possibly be made entirely of jokes.

Tee-hee... oh, me! ☆ Thinking too much is a bad habit! ☆

...I can't deal with this unless I make light of it.

With those thoughts in my heart, I arrived at District 2.

I pedaled my little bike through District 2. Although the types of shops lining the street were different, the atmosphere was identical to District 1.

Since the backgrounds were compatible... just as I thought! I found the fishmonger shop in the exact same location as my house in District 1.

What a ridiculous city... and for that matter, what a ridiculous name for a shopping district...

I got off my bike and peeked at the fishmonger from behind cover. Are the people standing at the storefront the heroine's parents? ...Thank goodness. They look similar to my parents, but they aren't identical.

「Flora! Be careful on your way! And make sure you're back before it gets dark!」

Suddenly hearing my own name called, I couldn't help but jump. But this surely wasn't 'my name.'

「Okaaaaay! I'm off!」

A cheerful girl's voice came from inside the shop.

I waited with a racing heart, and then a girl ran out from the store.

Oh... God...

Why did You create such a sloppy world...?

The girl who came out of the shop was a dead ringer for me, with only her hair and eye color being different.

The Flora-chan who looked just like me and had the same name as me pulled a bicycle out from the side of the shop while saying, 「Heave-ho...」

It was a pink child's bicycle with training wheels.

Seriously, it’s the exact same bike as mine, just a different color...

My parents bought me this bike for my birthday last year. I’m sure that girl’s bike was the same.

Once Flora-chan rode away with her training wheels clattering, I came out from hiding and made my way home.

The fishmonger Flora-chan definitely existed. And just as I imagined, she was a 'compatible' girl—a palette swap of me.

That means the greengrocer Flora-chan is definitely there too... and she'll be another palette swap...

A few days later, I went to the District 3 Shopping District and found the greengrocer Flora-chan. Her bike was a pale violet. It was an elegant color, and I found myself thinking, 「That’s nice...」

Well, all three heroines exist.

In that case, I should assume that those 「Common sense? What's that? Is it tasty?」 love interests are all here too.

The Crown Prince exists. I have no way of investigating the Duke’s son, who is the love interest for the greengrocer. I don't have any acquaintances among high-ranking nobles. The same goes for the King’s brother, the hidden character.

I wonder if the love interest for my butcher shop, Taurus-kun the knight, exists...

Actually, I'm glad I'm the butcher!!

Even if you don't intend to pursue him, you can't treat the Crown Prince coldly, and the same goes for the Duke’s son. As for the King’s brother, as befitting his title of 'hidden character,' I’ll have him stay hidden.

Taurus-kun’s father is the Knight Commander, but they are commoners. He lives somewhere in the capital. I have no idea where, since it never appeared in the game. Can I track him down starting from the fact that 「his father is the Knight Commander」? Is there some way?

Also, another thing on my mind—the heroine was supposed to be 「all alone in the world after losing her parents in an accident.」

But I have grandparents. The ones who took care of me while the shop was being renovated. They are my father's parents, by the way. My maternal grandmother is also alive and well. Unfortunately, my maternal grandfather passed away young. I also have uncles, aunts, and cousins.

I'm far from being 「all alone in the world.」

Even if my parents were to die in an accident, I have over ten relatives. Or are my uncles, aunts, and cousins all going to die out too? No, surely not, no matter how you look at it.

Then why was the setting 「all alone in the world」?

...I don't know, no matter how much I think about it. Moreover, it was never clearly stated in the game when the heroine’s parents died, or what kind of accident it was. There’s no way to prevent it.

Alright, I’ll just bet on the fact that this is a 'Bad Joke Comedy World'! A sad past doesn't suit a comedy world! A comedy world only needs smiles!

Please, God...! Since You created such a ridiculous world, the heroine’s circumstances should be equally ridiculous!!

The people in 'Game Reincarnation' stories are so lucky... knowing the detailed pasts of the characters and all. In my case, because the original character was like a 'symbol,' the profile might as well not exist. If it were a text-based game, I might have known more settings... No, in this world-view, having detailed settings would probably just give me more headaches...

Since I can only leave my parents' situation to God, I have to do something about Taurus-kun, the love interest for me (the butcher heroine)!

If there is such a thing as 'narrative force,' I’ll have to run the butcher shop by myself at sixteen. Having a dizzyingly stupid boy (a.k.a. a love interest) there would truly be nothing but a nuisance to business.

I have to find him somehow...!

With a sense of mission in my heart, I rode my bicycle through the capital.

*****

Some of the cultural reference found in this chapter.

Hana remembers her past life not because of a tragic accident, but because her father renovates their butcher shop to look exactly like a Ramen Shop (Ra-Sho). "Ra-Sho" is the common abbreviation for Ramen Shop, a famous, gritty franchise in Japan known for its red signs and "Delicious" slogans.
English is referred to as the language of the "Rice Empire" (Beikoku). In Japanese, the kanji for America is 米国 (Beikoku), which literally translates to "Rice Country." * Antoine’s "Eiken Grade 4" (a very basic level of English proficiency in Japan) being her limit adds to the relatability of her struggle.
Despite being a "European" fantasy world, everyone speaks 100% perfect Japanese and uses classical phrases like Mono no aware. This is a jab at the Isekai genre where "Translation Magic" is usually used to explain away the language barrier. Here, there is no magic; the developer was just too lazy to invent a fantasy language, so they made the "Sei-Sene Kingdom" culturally Japanese with a "Western" skin.
Hana realizes she doesn't have a "villainess" or a love rival. In this "crap game," the only competition is literally business competition. Instead of fighting for a prince's heart, she's fighting to see who can sell more pork chops.
Antoine complains that she is a "Symbol Character." In many management sims, NPCs don't have backstories; they are just icons that trigger events. Antoine has no "tragic backstory" to prevent because her character was never deep enough to have one. Her profile "might as well not exist," which she finds both a relief and an insult to her existence.
Hana’s MOD is so "performance-friendly" it leaves nothing in the registry. This is "PC Gamer" humor. A clean uninstall/install is the dream of every MOD user. Antoine is more impressed by the clean coding and registry management of the cheat than the fact that it actually breaks the game. It shows her true colors as a dedicated gamer.

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