HowDeadTL: 5. The guard knight who must never laugh

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The Duke's Daughter Goes Her Own Way

[The guard knight who must never laugh]

Translated by: ME

The appointment as a guard knight for His Royal Highness Prince Leonardo has already passed four years. The Prince, who used to have an innocent childish air, is now fourteen years old. His childishness has completely disappeared, and instead, he now exudes a sharp and intelligent impression. Although the Prince has a slender and graceful appearance, he is actually exceptionally skilled with the sword. However, that doesn't mean we can do away with his guards.

I was directly appointed as a guard by His Highness, and now I am the head knight attached to the Prince. Because it was an unusual occurrence, there seems to have been some conflict regarding the appointment. But, His Highness silenced them all.

[Your Highness, excuse me. Do you have a moment?]

To the maid who came to ask, the Prince replied curtly, [What is it?] The Prince hates waste. Thanks to that, the workplace has good communication and is comfortable.

[Lady Elizabeth wishes to see Your Highness. Would you be willing to grant her some time?]

[Of course. Show her in.]

[Yes.]

The maid gave a bow and withdrew for the moment. The Prince would never treat his fiancée, Lady Elizabeth, coldly. Even if he didn't have time, if Lady Elizabeth requested a meeting, he would force himself to make time. Everyone around the Prince knows that he cherishes her.

Soon, Lady Elizabeth arrived, accompanied by a maid. She is a very beautiful princess who gives a delicate impression, but her charm is probably not just that.

[Thank you for taking the time to see me.]

Lady Elizabeth bowed deeply, and the Prince stood up from his desk and walked towards her. He took her hand and led her to the reception sofa, then sat down next to her. Lady Elizabeth casually looked around the office with a natural gesture. After a moment, she nodded to herself.

The Prince smiled slightly at her gesture. Similarly, I and the other guard knight also lowered our eyes, trying not to laugh.

[Did I pass?]

The Prince asked teasingly, and Lady Elizabeth gave him a radiant smile.

[Today, as always, your work is wonderful!]

[Is that so...]

The Prince's shoulders trembled slightly as he responded. In contrast, Lady Elizabeth had a beaming smile.

I was also present when Lady Elizabeth and the Prince first met. Guard knights for the royal family, including the Prince, are selected with special conditions. Our primary job as guards is to protect the members of the royal family who are our charges. For example, if a thief were to break in, our job is not to capture the thief. It is to ensure the safety of the royal family. Capturing thieves is the job of the palace guards. Therefore, it is not enough for us to simply be skilled with a sword. We focus on training on how to quickly separate them from danger, how to maneuver to safely evacuate the person we are guarding, and so on. Of course, we also hone our swordsmanship and train our bodies.

Because that is our job, we have fixed positions. Especially within the palace, in this location, the number and arrangement of guards is like this is completely decided. It is an arrangement that always keeps the person being guarded in sight and creates no blind spots around them.

And among the palace knights who protect the royal family, those with particularly good looks are given priority when selecting guard knights. Our primary duty is to serve by the side of the royal family and always protect their person. Therefore, we also attend when they have meetings with dignitaries. In such cases, if they are accompanied by guards who are too stern or have a menacing appearance, some people may feel 'intimidated'. Taking that into consideration, we choose those who are as non-intimidating and good-looking as possible.

I am aware that I am reasonably good-looking. Sometimes, I am approached by young ladies even while standing guard. The Prince chose me partly because of my appearance. According to the Prince, [It's helpful because the annoying sidelong glances from young ladies are diverted.] ...Am I a human sacrifice rather than a guard?

On the day of the Prince and Lady Elizabeth's first meeting, we guards were in our assigned positions. It was the same as always. We kept the Prince at the center of our vision and simultaneously guarded the surroundings. The guards present eliminated any blind spots around the Prince. Guards were also hidden in places out of our reach.

When the Prince took his seat, Lady Elizabeth looked around with a natural gesture, as if viewing the entire garden. Then she nodded to herself as if she was satisfied with something. Was she satisfied with the beauty of the garden? Or did she feel a sense of superiority because of our good looks? Everyone present, including the Prince, would be stunned by the conversation that followed. And then I thought. She is a person of such great insight.

It became clear during the conversation that Lady Elizabeth was not swayed by the beauty of the garden. ...Then, what was she looking at? And what was she satisfied with? When I told the Prince about it, he seemed to have felt the same way.

[I'll ask Lady Elizabeth about it later,] the Prince said.

Several months after their first meeting, the Prince asked about that day. I, who was waiting in attendance, was called by the Prince and joined the conversation at his side.

[About the first time I met you--]

[What is it?] Lady Elizabeth asked, tilting her head curiously, and the Prince tilted his head slightly as well.

[After I took my seat, you looked around, didn't you? You do that today too.]

That's right. On this day, and before, Lady Elizabeth would always look around and nod as if she was satisfied after the Prince took his seat.

[What are you looking at?]

[Well...]

Lady Elizabeth looked awkwardly up and to the side, and the Prince gave a wry smile.

[I won't be surprised by anything you say now. ...No, I'll be surprised, but I won't blame you.]

I'd be surprised, wouldn't I...? I involuntarily agreed with the Prince's words in my mind.

After hesitating for a while, Lady Elizabeth opened her mouth timidly.

[I was looking at... the arrangement... of the guards...]

Arrangement. ...Huh? Arrangement!? The Prince was also a little dumbfounded. Since meeting Lady Elizabeth, the Prince's expressions have become richer. ...I suppose that's a good thing.

[The positions and the viewing angles. There are no blind spots or wasted movements, and they achieve maximum efficiency with the minimum number of people. It's wonderful...]

Because we were dumbfounded and speechless, Lady Elizabeth's voice became quieter and quieter. It was an answer I had never even considered. Not the beauty of the garden, not the Prince's beauty, not our somewhat good looks, but the arrangement! And the fact that she was satisfied today means that she had checked them again today. ...She's the first young lady I've ever met like this (in a good way).

Since then, every time Lady Elizabeth showed a gesture of satisfaction, the Prince would ask in a teasing tone, [Did it pass again today?] And each time, Lady Elizabeth would nod with an adorable smile and say, [It's wonderful!]

[We can't let our guard down,] I joked with my colleagues. Not that I had any intention of letting my guard down in the first place.

Lady Elizabeth, who had given us a 'passing grade' again today, received a small package from the maid who was waiting behind her. The paper with delicate lace patterns was tied like a small pouch with a ribbon. Was it a present for the Prince? Lady Elizabeth held it respectfully with both hands and presented it to the Prince.

[What is this?]

The Prince asked curiously, and Lady Elizabeth lowered her eyes as if looking at the package in her hands.

[I made cookies.]

[You made them? Ellie?]

[Yes.]

After nodding, Lady Elizabeth stared intently at the adorable package. Her eyes were too serious and a little scary.

[I think girls tend to admire things like handmade items and cute things!]

[Ah, uh, yeah... I guess... ?]

Your Highness! You're using a questioning tone!

[As a girl! I had to try making handmade sweets at least once, so I made up my mind!]

[Ah, yeah... ?]

Your Highness! Even your agreement is in the form of a question!

[And what I ended up with are these cookies (provisional)!]

[Wait a minute. What's with the (provisional)?]

The Prince is used to making these interjections. Lady Elizabeth is, of course, also used to being interrupted by the Prince.

[No matter how I look at it, I can only describe them as something indescribable that resembles a cookie...]

Something indescribable that resembles a cookie... What should I do? I'm terribly interested. I'm only interested. The Prince has a distant look in his eyes, but I personally am only interested.

[We have a maid in our house who is very good at making sweets, and I tried making them while she taught me. But I have no idea how they turned out like this.]

She was pleading with a serious expression, but I wish she would stop targeting our abs. I can never tell Lady Elizabeth, but the position of guard attached to this Crown Prince has become known as the abdominal muscle strengthening unit in recent years. The reason is that Lady Elizabeth's words and actions are just so funny. It's so far off the mark that I want to say she's definitely trying to make us laugh. However, as guard knights, we cannot laugh at her words and actions in front of our master. So we are constantly being tested on our abs by Lady Elizabeth.

[The procedure and ingredients are all correct. Cooking is chemistry, so if you don't make a mistake with those, the result should naturally follow.]

[That's right.]

The Prince's reply was a little careless.

Lady Elizabeth untied the ribbon on the adorable package she was holding. Inside were neatly shaped round cookies. As far as I could see from here, they looked like normal cookies. She placed the package on her lap, took out two cookies from it, and clinked them together.

[They make a nice sound, like well-made charcoal, don't they?]

Every time the cookies touched, a clear sound rang out, clink, clink.

[Yeah...?]

The Prince's agreement was in the form of a question again. Meanwhile, we continued to be tested on our abs.

[As you probably guessed, they have a surprising amount of strength. I don't understand why.]

The Prince gave up even agreeing. Lady Elizabeth looked at the cookies (provisional) in her hands and sighed wistfully.

[Even so, these are the best ones I made. That's why I thought I'd give them to Your Highness... Ah! They won't harm your body if you eat them! That's already been proven!]

[Yeah, I see...]

[And what's even more surprising is that, no matter what I did, they have no taste at all!]

Norman, my colleague who was standing near the doorway, couldn't help but burst out laughing at Lady Elizabeth's earnest appeal. I was close to laughing too, but I covered my mouth with my fist and endured. Norman, who had burst out laughing, coughed softly to cover it up. Lady Elizabeth didn't seem to notice.

[What happened to all that sugar I put in, the butter, the eggs...? What kind of miracle happened to these cookies (provisional)?]

[A miracle...]

Please stop, Your Highness. Our abs are about to scream.

[Even so, I practiced and practiced for a week. This is my best work in the cookie genre. And our head chef told me that I'm no longer allowed to use the kitchen, so these are my first and last cookies.]

[First and last...]

Thanks to the Prince repeating that word for word, I ended up coughing many times. Norman was trembling.

[Just in case, as a made them as a memento thing, I brought them to Your Highness... You can use them to play by setting up a pin in the distance and throwing them at it.]

[...Wait, they're cookies, right?]

[Personally, that's what I intended.]

Even I started trembling at Lady Elizabeth's serious nod. Today's abdominal muscle training is quite hard.

[I'll try one.]

The Prince took a cookie (provisional) from the package that Lady Elizabeth had spread on her lap. He tried to break it in half, but it wouldn't break. He was putting a lot of force into it, and the Prince's arm was shaking. At that sight, Norman was already on the verge of death.

[...Are these really cookies?]

Lady Elizabeth tilted her head when the Prince, who had given up on breaking it, asked.

[I don't know. The ingredients and recipe are those of ordinary cookies.]

The Prince walked over to his desk, spread a handkerchief on it, placed the cookie on top, and wrapped it in the handkerchief. Then, he took out a paper knife from the drawer and slammed the handle of the knife onto the cookie. Clang, a sound that should never come from a pastry, rang out.

At the same time, Norman quietly left the room. A knight who had been guarding the corridor came in to replace him. Dion, who had come in to replace him, had a slightly cheerful expression, wondering what had destroyed Norman's abs. Enjoy it while you can.

The Prince, who had returned to the sofa with the handkerchief package that supposedly contained the broken cookie (provisional), gently opened the package.

[Good. It's properly broken.]

The Prince's relieved words struck my abs directly. I wanted to leave like Norman, but since I had been given the title of head knight, I couldn't leave the Prince's side so easily.

The Prince picked up a small piece from the package and put it in his mouth.

[Ah! Please don't bite it! Our gardener broke his tooth on it!]

The gardener!! What a disaster for the gardener!!

The Prince was silent for a while, rolling the piece of cookie (provisional) around in his mouth, but after a while, he sighed.

[...It really doesn't taste like anything.]

[That's right...]

Please don't nod with such a serious face! I can't move from here!

[I'll give some to you guys too.]

The Prince stood up smoothly and gave pieces of the cookie (provisional) to me and Dion as well.

[Ah, please don't force yourselves to bite it!]

The Prince was also eating it in front of us. There was no way we could refuse. For the time being, I put it in my mouth. The texture was strangely smooth. It was like putting a smooth stone in my mouth. And really, even when I tried to dissolve it with my tongue, it had no taste. There was a slight hint of butter... I think.

[I've been thinking...]

Lady Elizabeth, seeing the Prince sitting next to her again, made a serious face.

[Yeah?]

[How about using them as military emergency rations? They have no taste, but they last a long time, and they definitely contain sugar and butter, so they can replenish calories. And, in an emergency, they might even be used as weapons.]

Goff, Dion burst out laughing.

That night, I returned to the dormitory and shared the hard abdominal muscle training of the day with Norman and Dion.

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